


you keep me dreaming (that I could make you mine this season)

by boone_missed



Series: Holidays are better with lesbians [1]
Category: The Haunting of Bly Manor (TV)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, But they're both so in love, Christmas, Christmas Fluff, Dani loves Christmas, Everyone lives, F/F, Fluff, Happy Ending, Idiots in Love, Jamie's a Grinch, fluffing the christmas tree
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-14
Updated: 2020-12-14
Packaged: 2021-03-10 21:08:14
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 14,144
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28063713
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/boone_missed/pseuds/boone_missed
Summary: Dani- who loves Christmas more than any other holiday- has had a crush on Jamie since day one. Discovering that Jamie may be the world's biggest Grinch should take care of that crush. Right?-or-Fourteen thousand words of pure Christmas fluff
Relationships: Dani Clayton & Jamie, Dani Clayton/Jamie
Series: Holidays are better with lesbians [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2055729
Comments: 14
Kudos: 181





	you keep me dreaming (that I could make you mine this season)

**Author's Note:**

> After months (years) of not writing I sat down to write this in a single day. So it may be an absolute mess. But so are these two adorable disaster gays

You had been quite convinced that one Jamie Taylor had no flaws until a random Tuesday afternoon in mid-November.

You were standing at the sink in Bly’s kitchen, doing the dishes and looking out the window absentmindedly. Owen had negotiated taking the kids for their dentist appointments in exchange for you cleaning up after his lunchtime extravaganza, and it was too good of a deal to turn down no matter how boring doing the dishes was. The last time the kids were at the dentist you heard that Miles made the dentist cry.

So you were standing at the sink, scrubbing the dishes and singing happily along with the Christmas music you had been playing on the radio. Your hands were plunged in the soapy water and you were dancing along with _Santa Claus is Coming to Town_ when a groan sounded behind you.

“What is the bloody racket?”

You turned to see the gardener, and as it always did, your breath caught in your throat.

Jamie Taylor was one of the most beautiful, amazing people you had ever met. You had been working at Bly for officially two days when you had first been introduced to Jamie, and instantly you had immediately found yourself enamoured. Everything from her accent to her smile to the never-ending supply of overalls she seemed to own to the nicknames she graced you with just endeared her more to you. Your crush was none too subtle, with Hannah and Owen and even the kids picking up on it.

Everyone knew about your not so secret crush except for Jamie herself.

“What racket?” you ask, genuinely confused.

She motions to the radio. “Is that Christmas music Poppins? In November? There’s a law against that in some parts, you know.”

“There’s no rule about Christmas music!”

“It’s terrible enough that there should be.”

You freeze. You look at Jamie suspiciously. “Do you not like Christmas music?”

Jamie blinks. She had taken an apple from the fruit bowl and she bites into it slowly, regarding you carefully. “And if I say I don’t?”

Well, you think, that would just about take care of the crush you had been harbouring for months. Jamie couldn’t very well be perfect if she didn’t like Christmas music, now could she? It was all so happy, and there were bells in the instrumentals. Who could listen to music with bells in it and not be instantly cheerful?

Instead, you end up saying, “Well, I’ll just have to convince you that you’re wrong.”

Jamie flashes you her trademark lopsided grin. “I’m never wrong Poppins.” She winks at you, and your heart seems to skip a beat.

Jamie finishes her apple and joins you at the sink, drying as you wash. She doesn’t seem to care as you continue to hum and sing along to all the classics, and you even catch her laughing at you once or twice. You’ve almost finished the dishes when Mariah Carey comes on and you actually squeal in delight. Jamie doubles over in laughter and you wrinkle your nose at her.

“Don’t laugh! This is the best Christmas song ever!”

“It’s overrated,” Jamie returns.

And, well, if Miles and Flora return from the dentist to find the kitchen a mess from all the water and bubbles that had gotten splashed everywhere while you and Jamie had your playful battle royal, you really couldn’t be blamed.

No one disliked Christmas music on your watch.

***

It’s a week later when you begin to suspect that it’s not just Christmas music that Jamie hates. She had just gone out to pick up some supplies for her greenhouse, but when she returned she was grumbling and looking frustrated. You watch her kick off her boots by the side entrance near the kitchen, and Jamie launches them with just a bit too much vitriol.

“Uh Jamie?” you start uncertainly. “Everything okay?”

“The mall already has Christmas decorations up,” Jamie grumbles. “Who the hell puts Christmas decorations up before it’s even December? And the crowds are already obnoxious, honestly. This time of year is legitimately the worst.”

And it should be a problem, you think. It really should throw a wrench into the whole liking her thing if she truly does hate Christmas. Except that she looks so cute all disgruntled and you can somehow tell that her Grinchiness is all for show and you think that your crush actually grows about ten times bigger.

***

Bly Manor is like a little bit of England carved out and placed smack dab in the middle of Midwestern America. When the Wingrave’s had tragically passed away, and Henry ended up sole guardian of Miles and Flora, he decided the memories were too painful at the original manor. So he packed up the kids and used his fortune to buy an estate overseas, bringing most of the staff with him.

It was how you had stumbled across the job opening for an au pair, fresh out of a relationship and single for the first time in your adult life and altogether lost with what your next move should be. You saw the ad in the paper and sent in your resume straight away, and after a rocky interview with Henry which saw the two of you go basically toe to toe, you landed the role. And really, you never regretted it for a second. The only thing to not go perfectly was apparently your propensity for desecrating tea and coffee. But honestly, you thought they were all exaggerating. It always tasted fine to you.

Nonetheless, everyone seemed happy enough from their transplanted native country. When the first snowfall of the season occurred, Miles and Flora were practically through the roof with excitement.

“Look at it!” Flora squealed delightedly as she looked out the window. “It’s so white and fluffy! It’s perfectly splendid.”

Even Miles, who could be a bit quiet and drawn at times, seemed to have been invigorated by waking up to a snowfall. “Can we go outside and build a snowman Miss Clayton?” he asked, his eyes shining bright with excitement. “We hardly ever saw snow back home- especially not snow like this! Look at how deep it is!”

And really, how could you refuse the two children who had so quickly captured your heart? So the three of you bundled up in your boots and jackets and scarfs and mittens, and even Hannah decided to join you in your adventures. Though she did seem to enjoy the role of supervisor more than actually frolicking in the snow.

The kids were bundles of energy as they gathered the snow and rolled it together. You helped out as best you could, though if truth be told you were never great shakes at building snowmen. But you gave it a valiant effort, and soon enough the three of you had three giant snowballs sitting there, ready for stacking. Which presented an entirely new problem for everyone.

“Come on guys, we can do this!” you panted, trying to lift the middle section.

Miles’ cheeks were red. “It’s too heavy! We need some help!”

That was when you spied a figure trudging up and down along the drive, snow shovel in hand. You got to your feet and waved your arms above your head, calling her over. “Jamie!” you yelled. “Come help us!”

Jamie came over, wading through the nearly knee high snow. She looked exhausted, her cheeks were beet red, and she didn’t seem much swayed by the idea of building a snowman.

“I hate the snow,” she moaned. “It’s cold and it’s wet.”

“Oh boohoo, you big crybaby,” you laugh. “We’ll go inside and sit by the fire afterwards, sipping hot chocolate. It’s not that bad!”

“Says the person who hasn’t been shovelling mountains of snow all morning.”

And oh. You kind of get how tired she looks now. You also understand more about how Jamie always looks so good and in shape and how toned her arms always are. Briefly, you wonder if all the physical work she does around the property gives her abs, and you have to shut down that thought quickly before you start to drool.

“Please help us?” you beg, putting on your most convincing pout.

“I’ve spent hours shovelling this damn snow, and you want me to spend more time in it?” She looks exasperated, but she also looks like she’s cracking a little bit. There’s a small smile playing at her lips.

“Oh please help us, Miss Jamie!” Flora cries. “Please oh please, we’re just so excited to build our first snowman!”

And as Jamie’s eyes flicker back and forth between you and Flora, both sporting your best puppy dog faces, you can see as her façade falters, before finally dropping altogether.

“Fine,” she huffs, but she’s laughing and her eyes are twinkling. “But I expect some help with the driveway next time, deal?”

The kids agree straight away, and Miles even snaps off a fine salute. Jamie chuckles and together the two of you manage to lift the middle section and place it atop the bottom. The top snowball, lighter still, you probably could’ve handled on your own. But Jamie still helps you with it, and as you place it together atop the structure, you realize how close you’re standing. She’s right beside you, and if you were to turn slightly you would almost be within kissing distance of those lips that you had thought about kissing nearly every day since first meeting her…

“He needs some accessories, don’t ya think, gremlins?”

With Jamie’s help, the four of you come up with a top hat of Henry’s that you’re not entirely sure he’d be okay with you using for a snowman, and a scarf of Owen’s that Hannah had provided all too easily with a somewhat evil grin. Hannah also gets some spare buttons from her sewing kit, and it’s Jamie who manages to scrounge up a carrot from the kitchen for the nose. Miles discovers two sturdy branches by the edge of the woods for the arms, and Flora grabs a pair of mittens from her dolls to shove on the ends of the branches. Finally, just the mouth is left to do, and an argument ensues.

“We can’t use more buttons!” Miles protests. “Then the mouth would look the same as the eyes! You’re stupid.”

“Miles don’t call your sister that!” you warn.

“But Miss Clayton…”

“Miles, you heard her,” Hannah says sternly, and the boy pouts dramatically.

“Well we don’t have any actual coal here,” you say, “and I don’t know where we could find any. Although we were supposed to use that for the eyes, weren’t we?”

“We could use raisins,” Flora suggests. And nobody has any better suggestions, so Jamie steals some from the kitchen.

The end result is a massive albeit lopsided snowman with a rather eerie grin, but the kids are cheering like it’s the best thing they’ve ever seen.

“It’s perfectly splendid!” Flora gushes.

“It’s gonna melt at the first thaw,” Jamie says under her breath, and you elbow her in the side harshly. She looks at you. “What? It’s not a lie!”

“They’re kids!” you hiss. “Don’t ruin their excitement.”

“Hey I’ve still got half a driveway to shovel if you haven’t noticed. Excuse me for being a little grumpy.”

“Why are you so grumpy about Christmas anyway?” you ask, slightly heated. “Oh don’t give me that look, I’ve noticed how everything from snow to mall Santas to my choice of music gets you upset.”

Jamie throws up her hands. “I just helped you build a snowman Poppins! If that isn’t Christmas spirit than I don’t know what is.”

“But then you tried to dash their hopes…”

“Don’t be dramatic, I whispered it.”

“You still can’t say things like that!”

“Oh come on, have you never noticed how morbid _Frosty the Snowman_ is? If the kids can sleep at night after that then…”

A throat clears and you and Jamie both jump. You hadn’t realized how close you had gotten to her again, and take a slight step back to see Hannah, Miles, and Flora all staring at the pair of you. All three look amused, and there’s an almost knowing component to Hannah’s smile as she looks at you.

“I think I’m going to take _these_ children in to warm up,” she says, motioning to Miles and Flora. “Why don’t you two children stay out here and finish up the driveway?”

Your cheeks warm slightly as Hannah ushers the kids inside, and Jamie is quietly scuffing her boot around in the snow. Suddenly you burst out laughing, and Jamie looks at you in incredulity for a moment before joining in.

“I can’t believe you think _Frosty the Snowman_ is morbid!” you laugh, clutching your sides.

“It is!” Jamie wheezes. “The bloody snowman dies, have you never actually realized that?”

And somehow the situation gets even funnier, and you collapse into the snow, pants getting wet be damned. Jamie’s wiping tears from her eyes, and it takes you both far too long to calm down. You don’t even really know what got you laughing in the first place, but it was the type of thing you could only share with a good friend.

“Well, come on Poppins.” Jamie offers her glove clad hand to help you up. “We better get started on our punishment.”

***

“Hey Poppins!”

The two of you are just about done clearing the drive, and you look up expectantly, thinking Jamie has something important to say. Instead a snowball hits you directly in the face. You’re spitting out snow as Jamie is doubled over in maniacal laughter.

“Oh you think that’s funny, do you?”

And she should know better than to pick a snowball fight with you, really. You’ve spent your whole life dealing with snowy winters, and you had played on the softball team in highschool. Your perfectly sculpted snowball hits her directly in the shoulder, and then you’re the one laughing.

“It’s on now Poppins.”

When Hannah comes out to check on the two of you several minutes later, you’re both covered in snow and engaged in an ultra-competitive snowball war complete with battle stations.

Hannah shakes her head. “I’m the only actual adult around these parts, I swear.”

***

You convince Henry that hosting a grand Thanksgiving dinner is in order, and Owen is only too happy to comply. Nobody except for you has ever celebrated the holiday, of course, but the only concession Hannah makes is that you fully explain to Miles and Flora everything about the history included, even the bad. _Especially_ the bad, she emphasizes.

You’re mainly excited for the big feast though. You had been enjoying Owen’s dinners for three months by that point, and you couldn’t wait to see what he could do with turkey and stuffing and pie for dessert. Everyone seemed in good spirits about the upcoming event. Everyone except one person in particular, of course.

“Yikes, Poppins, this holiday sounds mental,” Jamie groaned, reading about Thanksgiving on her phone.

“Is there anything about this time of year that doesn’t sound mental to you?” you challenge.

Jamie grins, and you wish that she wasn’t so attractive. It’s always hard trying to win a debate with her because everything from her curly hair to her eyes to her lips distracts you.

“Name one good thing about this particular holiday.”

“Turkey!” you say instantly.

Jamie shrugs. “Never been that fussed about it, honestly. I prefer a good steak.”

“Fine…pie.”

“Again, not my favourite. Now if Owen bakes one of his famous cakes, you might have me interested. But there’s something about pie crust that has always rubbed me the wrong way.” She thinks about it for a moment. “Could be the texture.”

You frown a bit. “You’re impossible,” you huff. “What about family? The holidays are all about spending time with your family!”

“I spend every single day and night with you all. By that logic every day is a bloody holiday for me.”

You’re touched that she considers you part of her family. Jamie was a bit tight lipped about her past, but you know that she didn’t have the most stable upbringing. The fact that she already considers you close enough to be family warms your heart a little bit.

You don’t have time to be touched, however. You’re on a mission.

“The Macy’s Thanksgiving Day parade is always fun to watch!”

“Sounds like a better time to take a nap to me.”

You grit your teeth and hate how much enjoyment she’s getting out of this. That little smirk on her face makes you want to grab her by the straps of her overalls and pull her in close and kiss it right off those lips.

“Black Friday is the next day. So you know, great deals!”

Jamie laughs. “Do I strike you as the type of person to be wooed by consumerism?”

“Fine. What about football? Plenty of football games to watch!” She looks confused for a minute, and it takes you a bit to realize your mistake. “Oh, like, American football. You know,” you mime a throwing motion. “Not like soccer.”

“Soccer,” she moans, shaking her head. “That’s not a real name. And I don’t get the deal about your national sport over here. Like why is called football? It’s more about throwing an oval than kicking a ball. And it always stops every ten seconds. Like what’s the big deal?”

“Jamie!” you groan. “Come on. Isn’t there anything about the holidays that you like?”

She sits in her armchair for a minute, thinking. Then she stands, grin on her face, and makes her way over to where you’re lounging on the couch. Before you know it, Jamie bends down and presses her lips to your cheek.

“I might be able to think of one or two things, Poppins,” she whispers. “But you’ll have to figure them out for yourself.”

You sit frozen, watching her walk out of the room with a slight spring in her step. You’re pretty sure your mouth is hanging open, and your cheek is tingling where Jamie kissed it. You bring your fingers to the spot, touching it gingerly. For a moment you think about what she said, and the fact she kissed your cheek, and you think that maybe…

But no. It couldn’t be.

Jamie Taylor returning your crush would be a Christmas miracle, and even you didn’t really believe in the power of Christmas magic _quite_ that much.

***

It’s still dark as you stand in line outside of Costco. You’ve got a thermos of coffee in your hand, a portable charger for your phone should you need it, and your purse is filled with snacks. You take Black Friday shopping very seriously.

Beside you, Jamie is slumped over the handle of the cart, and you think she may have fallen back asleep. She had drawn the short straw as to being the one to accompany you on your mission, and when you shook her awake at four thirty that morning you practically had to drag her down the stairs. You made note that Jamie Taylor is apparently not a morning person.

You double check the list you have on your phone. You’ve needed a new smartwatch for ages, so that’s your top priority. Henry had given you permission to buy a video gaming system for the kids provided they spent less than an hour a day on it (you had your suspicions that the adults in the house would all be fighting over the other twenty-three). In the back of your mind you were also thinking about trying to sneak in a camera purchase for Jamie. Aside from gardening, you knew she dabbled in photography. Her camera was old, and you had heard her longing about needing a new one but not wanting to spend the money. It was probably a bit too expensive for a Christmas gift for a friend but…well Jamie seemed worth it.

When the line finally begins moving you get excited and elbow Jamie a little too vigorously. She grunts, startled, and her chin slips from where it had been resting on her fist. The clunk her forehead makes as it connects with the cart worries you a bit.

“Oh my goodness, are you okay?”

“Poppins,” she groans. “Why do you hate me?”

And you’d like to respond that you definitely don’t hate her, not even a little bit, and in fact it’s quite the opposite. But the people behind you in line are grumbling and as tired as she looks there’s still a playful glint in Jamie’s eyes that lets you know she’s joking.

Six hours later, when the two of you finally return home and carry in your purchases, Jamie looks like a zombie. She’s dragging her feet as she walks, and her shoulders are sagging. She yawns about every three steps, and Owen has a laughing fit when he sees her. Jamie flips him off before face planting onto the couch, and you think that she’ll probably be out for a solid few hours. Feeling grateful that she put up with the insane crowds with you for hours, you grab a blanket and carefully cover her. You kneel and place a soft kiss into her curls without thinking about it.

Owen’s giving you a knowing, playful grin as you stand up, and you bite the inside of your cheek. But he just winks at you and you can’t help but smile. You look back at your absolute gem of a friend snoozing on the couch and think that every penny of the camera and lenses you sneakily purchased was definitely worth it.

***

“Do you want some help with the snow?”

Jamie looks up at you quizzically. “Poppins, it’s not yet six in the morning and you’re practically bouncing with excitement to shovel snow. Are you okay?” She places a hand on your forehead. “You’re not sick, are you?”

You brush her hand away, laughing. “I just really want to help you with the snow.” You shrug. “I feel like I owe you.”

Jamie regards you for a minute or two. You see her eyes taking everything in- the way you had made sure you positioned your knitted headband perfectly to highlight your hair, how you had made sure to put on just a bit of makeup for shovelling, how you were practically bouncing on your toes and couldn’t keep the smile off your lips. You were sure your cheeks were the tiniest bit flushed as well.

Jamie quirks an eyebrow. “Poppins, you flirt.”

***

You have your Christmas playlist on Spotify going full blast. Setting up and decorating the Christmas tree has always been one of your favourite things about the holidays. Ever since you were a child you had always had a love, almost bordering on obsession, of Christmas trees.

Owen had helped you bring up the tree and countless boxes of decorations from the basement that morning. You were giddy as a schoolchild as you looked through everything. The tree itself was ten feet tall, and you had purchased a string of lights that could be controlled by your phone. It was going to be the best Christmas tree you had ever seen. Once it was decorated, that was.

At the moment, you were focused on separating all the branches. It was the most tedious part of the job, you found, but you knew how important it was. Without doing it, the decorations wouldn’t have proper space to hang and be fully displayed. You had never had to decorate a tree of quite this size before, however, and you start to think you may have underestimated the amount of time it would take. But you just let the music energize you and got right down to business, pulling branches apart as you sung along loudly and potentially slightly off key.

“We should really have a discussion about the type of music you listen to Poppins.”

You turn to see Jamie had entered the massive main living room, looking at you fondly. You smile at her.

“Jamie! Do you want to come help me fluff the tree?”

Jamie snorts. “Fluff the tree? What the hell does that even mean?” She starts chuckling. “Are you doing something inappropriate to that tree Poppins?”

“Jamie!” You feel yourself blush slightly. “That’s not…ugh you’re so difficult sometimes,” you say, and it’s not without adoration. “You have to fluff the tree for it to look good. It means separating all the branches so that all the ornaments have space to hang freely. It’s vitally important to how the tree turns out, and I’ll have you know that I’m one of the best tree fluffers I’ve ever met.”

“Weird flex, but okay.”

You roll your eyes at her. “So do you want to come help me?”

“I can’t think of anything I’d like to do less than fluff a Christmas tree,” she says dryly.

But five minutes later Jamie’s standing on a stepladder beside you, working at the top of the tree while you work at the bottom. She’s smiling just a bit, and you think you might even catch her mouthing some of the words to some of the songs.

You knew the Grinchy aura was just for show, you absolutely knew it.

***

There’s a hill out the back of Bly that you think would be absolutely perfect for tobogganing. The kids think so too, but Hannah looks a little bit worried when you all broach the idea to her. She seems like she’s on the verge of saying no when Owen stumbles into the room and overhears the plan. He gets so immediately excited and Hannah has such an apparent soft spot for him that it doesn’t take much longer for her to give them all the go ahead.

Dani takes her time getting the children dressed in all their outdoor gear. Owen’s practically straining at the leash by the time everyone is sufficiently bundled up. When they finally make their way outside he’s the first one to the hill, already lining up the various toboggans available to them. Dani was pleasantly surprised that there several options in the shed. She didn’t think Henry would keep things like that around. Every now and again the man gave her glimpses that he might actually be more devoted to Miles and Flora than he would ever let on.

The kids took to tobogganing straight away. Miles liked to take a running start and flop onto his sled on his belly, heading down the hill in a face first slide that made Dani’s heart race. Flora liked to sit primly on a little saucer, laughing gaily as it spun round and round down the hill. Hannah even joined in on the fun, riding tandem with Owen.

“What’s all this then?” You look up as Jamie approaches, taking in the event. “You don’t invite me to the only thing in all of winter that I’ll actually likely enjoy?”

“Well you hate everything else to do with the season so…”

“But this,” Jamie’s eyes shine, “Poppins this is _dangerous_. It’s right up my alley.”

Sure enough, Jamie is a veritable demon when it comes to sledding. She goes down the hill face first, standing up, backwards…any which way to give Dani a heart attack. Jamie quickly discovers a mini snowboard among the toboggans. It has a rope handle attached to the nose and it becomes her favourite toy after that. Miles looks vaguely jealous and asks to borrow it, but you step in at once.

“No way Miles. Jamie can make stupid decisions if she wants because she’s an adult. But that’s too dangerous for you.”

Miles pouts but you refuse to give in. Jamie, to her credit, stashes the little snowboard so he doesn’t see her riding it anymore either. You quickly realize she’s not going to settle down completely though. Jamie goes midway down the hill and drops to her knees, packing snow together to make a jump.

“You realize you’re making my life about twenty times more difficult, right Jamie?” you ask her.

Jamie grins up you. “Oh come on Poppins. I’ll keep it small, I promise. There will be no way the little kiddos could hurt themselves.”

True to her word, the jump Jamie creates is more of a bump than anything else, but Miles and Flora both seem to love aiming for it. They’d get just a touch of airtime before landing with what looked to you like bruising bounces, but their laughter was genuine. Owen, too, tried the jump out, and claimed that it was perfectly safe, if not a little rough on the tailbone.

“Care to test it out with me, madam?” Jamie’s holding a plastic toboggan by the string. “Would you like to drive or be the passenger?”

You pick driver, because you wouldn’t put it past Jamie to run the both of you straight into a tree. The instant she sits down behind you, you realize your mistake. Jamie wraps her arms around your middle, holding you close. You feel the warmth of her body, even under all the layers of clothing, and her legs come to rest on either side of your own. You swallow hard, trying not to let the sensations distract you.

“Alright Poppins,” she whispers into your ear, making you shiver, “let’s see what you’ve got.”

It’s a complete disaster, really. The toboggan probably wasn’t designed for two adults, and you definitely have a hard time steering when you have Jamie freaking Taylor holding you tightly from behind. The both of you take off down the hill at an angle, quickly picking up speed, and you hit the jump sideways and at the corner. You’re both off the toboggan before you hit the snow again, and you roll for a bit before coming to a stop. It feels like there’s snow in absolutely every single crevasse. It got in your mittens and in your boots and even down the top of your coat where your zipper wasn’t quite done up perfectly.

Some distance away, Jamie is laughing crazily. You get to your feet, looking down at her in wonder.

“How is it,” you ask, “with all the wonderful things the holidays have to offer, that _this_ is what you get the most enjoyment out of?”

Despite Jamie’s apparent Evel Knievel streak, everyone has a great time out in the snow. Even Henry, who came home from the office for his lunch break, joined in a couple of runs. There’s laughter and shrieks of delight and you think the kids might actually be getting tired out enough to stick to their bedtime later. Of course, Jamie’s mischievous streak gets the better of her before all is said and done.

Hannah announces five more minutes before you should all head inside to grab some food, and you quite agree. You’re sweating under all your layers, and you’ve all been outside for a few hours. You see the mischief brewing in Jamie’s eyes, and you don’t even have time to try and talk her out of it before she’s pulling out that deadly snowboard again and aiming for her now iced over jump.

You’re shouting at her, but it’s too little too late, and you can only watch in terror as she most definitely does not stick the landing and careens head first into some trees.

***

“Honestly I’m fine.”

“You could have been killed!” you cry, helping to lower Jamie down onto the couch.

Jamie rolls her eyes. “It was a toboggan, Dani, not a motorbike.”

“You smashed your head off that tree. Everyone saw it, you can’t deny it.”

“I was just trying to prove a point to the wee gremlins as to why they should always listen to your safety warnings.” You simply glare at her, and Jamie shifts somewhat uncomfortably on the couch. “Okay, so it wasn’t my smartest decision. But honestly I’ve had concussions before, and this doesn’t feel like a bad one even. I’ll be fine in two days tops.”

You sigh. “You scared me, Jamie,” you say quietly. You think your voice trembles a bit.

Jamie looks contrite and pats the couch cushion beside her. You sit, and she immediately wraps an arm around your shoulders to pull you in close.

“Sorry Poppins,” she says. You feel her lips press to your cheek once, then twice. And then a third time for good measure. “I’m sorry I worried you. But I promise you I’m fine. Just a bit of a headache.”

You turn your head to look at her straight on. “You’re sure?”

“I promise,” Jamie nods.

“You’re going to let me take care of you, right?” She nods again, and a small smile creeps its way onto your lips. “And you’re not going to scare me like that again, right?”

Jamie draws a hand over her chest. “Cross my heart.”

“And you’ll watch Christmas movies with me as part of your relaxing and recovering process?”

“Dani,” Jamie groans. “Come on, it’s a concussion, I haven’t had my brain transplanted.” But you pout at her as best she can and before long she sighs. “If anything’s gonna be the death of me it’s gonna be you, I swear,” she grumbles. But she’s smiling too.

***

Jamie falls asleep halfway through the Santa Clause, but you think you can forgive her for that.

She’s had a rough day, after all.

And she falls asleep with her head on your shoulder, hand entwined with yours under the blanket. She’s making these cute little snuffling sounds, not quite snoring, and you think your heart almost bursts with the cuteness of it all.

So yes, you think you can forgive her for falling asleep during one of your favourite movies.

***

“This is not a Christmas movie,” you say vehemently.

“It’s set on Christmas Eve!” Jamie protests. “They’re at a Christmas party, and there’s Christmas music.” Jamie’s holding up fingers as if checking items off a list. “How much more criteria is there to consider it a Christmas movie?”

“But Jamie there’s guns! And they’re all trying to kill each other.”

Jamie shrugs innocently. It’s been three days since her fall, and you’re beginning to realize you created a monster. After you made her promise to let you take care of you, Jamie’s been milking it for all it’s worth. All she has to do is look at you with her eyes held wide and you’re putty in her hands. It makes you feel a bit guilty for all the times you had used your own puppy dog eyes on her. Now you know what it feels like to be powerless.

There was no doubt she was feeling better- really, Jamie only had one day where she was noticeably tired and off kilter- but somehow she was able to convince you to stream Die Hard even though you remained convinced it wasn’t a Christmas movie.

“Look! He even wrote ho-ho-ho now I have…”

“That doesn’t make it Christmas, Jamie.”

Jamie grumbles. “It’s not like someone would write ho-ho-ho in July. Come on, this is my favourite movie! It has to count for something.”

“You’re twisted,” you tell her. “Absolutely twisted.”

***

“Look! A happy ending! That’s Christmas isn’t it?”

***

After making you suffer through two ‘Christmas’ themed Die Hard movies, you convince Jamie that she needs to watch something happier with you. The two of you had the day off, seeing as it was the weekend, and the day outside was cold and grey. That meant it was the perfect day for a movie marathon, though you were slightly unhappy with the way said marathon had been going. There was no way you were ever going to classify those action movies as holiday, no matter how cute Jamie looked quoting John McClane at every chance she got.

You took a short break to order some pizza, and then you started streaming Home Alone. Jamie curled into your side on the couch in the den. It wasn’t entirely new, the cuddling- both Jamie and you were fairly tactile people- but it had definitely escalated to a new level over the last few weeks. You couldn’t say that you were complaining about it.

“And you say my movies are bad…this kid is sadistic!” Jamie says between bites of pizza.

“Sadistic?” You laugh. “He’s a genius!”

“I’m just saying, he could have called the cops at any point. He wanted to inflict maximum pain and anarchy on the bandits. Sadistic.”

“It’s established early on in the movie that Kevin has a reason not to trust the police!” You might be getting a bit aggressive, but watching Home Alone has been your holiday tradition since you were little. You would defend it at all costs. “One of the bandits was pretending to be a cop, destroying the trust he might have had. Of course he’s not going to call them! Besides, he’s just a kid.”

“You say that like he’s helpless. But he’s a kid who’s smart enough to lay dozens of elaborate booby traps, so I don’t think he’s all that defenseless. He’s definitely getting some sort of sadistic enjoyment out of all this carnage.”

You shake your head in disbelief. “I can’t believe you enjoy the movies that you do and then watch this and pick on poor Kevin McCallister.”

Jamie laughs. “Sorry Poppins, I just got to call ‘em as I see ‘em.” You frown, resolutely looking at the TV instead of at Jamie. “Did I offend thee fair lady?”

“Jamie,” you can’t help but giggle at her silliness, “just watch the movie.”

“I am watching the movie!” she protests. “I just had an in depth discussion with about said movie, which I could not have done without watching it.”

“Fair enough,” you concede with a laugh. “But for real, shush. The ending is so sweet, you don’t want to miss it.”

She settles down, and the rest of the movie is enjoyed in a companionable silence. The ending always makes you tear up a bit. It’s just so ridiculously happy. Kevin is reunited with his mom, and then the rest of the family makes it home for Christmas too. And his neighbour gets to reunite with his son and granddaughter, and you’re just a bit of a suck for happy endings okay?

“Okay I guess that wasn’t terrib- shit, Poppins, are you crying?”

“I’m sorry,” you blubber, “I just think it’s so adorable at the end. Everyone gets their perfect little Christmas and I just really love it!”

Jamie’s looking at her with an inscrutable expression, and you’re worried she’s judging you for the tears running down your cheeks. But then she’s smiling, and her hands gently grasp your cheeks, pulling you in and connecting your lips. Your eyes flutter closed at the contact.

It’s the sweetest kiss you think you’ve ever experienced. Her lips are soft against yours and neither one of you make any move to deepen it because it’s perfect as is. She pulls away far too soon for your liking and you chase her lips blindly, capturing them once more. Jamie laughs a bit, and you can’t help smiling as well, as hard as it might be hard to kiss when both parties are smiling but you try anyway.

“Was that okay?” Jamie asks softly once you both break apart to breathe. “I should’ve asked before I kissed you I…”

“It was more than okay,” you say a little breathlessly.

Jamie smiles. “Thank fuck,” she whispers. And then she’s kissing you again and you think that perhaps Christmas came a little early this year.

***

When you wake up the next morning and Jamie’s in your arms, it takes you a bit of time to convince yourself that you’re not dreaming. But then the memories of the night you shared come rushing back and you smile, enjoying the delicious aching you feel. You can’t quite remember the last time you had felt so completely sated or the last time you slept so well.

You really can’t resist leaning in and pressing your lips to the bare skin of Jamie’s shoulder. She shifts slightly.

“Mornin’ Poppins,” she says, voice rough with sleep.

“Good morning,” you reply. When Jamie turns in your arms and burrows in tight, you decide there’s nothing wrong with another few minutes of sleep.

***

You catch yourself staring at Jamie more than once as everyone enjoys a lazy day inside, playing board games. She catches you too, giving you either winks or playful glares. You didn’t think it was that noticeable, but both Owen and Hannah are looking between the pair of you somewhat suspiciously.

It’s a revelation that the thought of people potentially knowing doesn’t bother you. You had never really come out to anyone, and had always thought you’d be too shy to. But there’s a warmth in your chest and you realize that you truly don’t care if Owen and Hannah and the rest of the occupants of Bly know. You’re still not sure what there even is to know, but once you figure it out you intend to shout it from the rooftops.

You’re staring again, and this time Jamie blows you a subtle kiss. Your heart flutters and you think you might just be able to float right away with happiness.

***

You’ve never been so grateful that the property and grounds of Bly are so huge. It gives Jamie plenty of options for places to grab you by the hand and drag you away for some privacy. Somehow, even with the numerous places to go, everyone else seems to have an uncanny knack for almost catching the two of you.

When Jamie had dragged you behind a tree for an impromptu kiss as you all enjoyed a walk in the woods it had been Miles who almost caught you, having turned around for a dropped mitten. Her greenhouse hadn’t been much better. In addition to practically getting frostbitten, Hannah had come looking for Jamie due to a plumbing issue inside the house. Flora had almost walked in on the two of you in the library, and the day after it was Owen, coming into the pantry for some flour and looking slightly disbelieving that Jamie had caught you stealing some cookies and was trying to stop you.

You were confident in your choice of secret makeout spots this time, however. The rest of the house seemed to be allergic to doing laundry on the best of days. So when Jamie took your hand and dragged you into the laundry room, you didn’t hold back for a second.

Jamie had lifted you up onto the dryer, and she was pressed in between your legs. Her tongue was exploring your mouth and her hands were sneaking up under your shirt while yours fumbled with her belt. The combination of Jamie’s lips and the vibrations from the dryer was driving you absolutely wild. Hooking your legs in behind her back you pull her in even closer, moaning into the kiss.

Jamie moves her kisses to your neck as her hand finally pushes aside your bra, and you gasp as you feel her touch grazing the sensitive flesh.

“Jamie,” you breathe, tilting your head to give her more access.

When Jamie’s other hand travels up your thigh and hikes your skirt up before finally reaching where you need it the most, you throw your head back. She makes you feel so good. Your entire body is on fire and you clutch at the back of her shirt desperately as she thrusts into you.

“God, Jamie, yes. Please Jamie…”

Nobody really bats an eye when you return to the kitchen several minutes later. You had taken some time to fix your hair, and though you’re breathing heavily, and you know you’re probably flushed, you think you’ve gotten away with it. Or at least, you think you’ve gotten away with it until Hannah looks at you with a raised eyebrow and a sly smile on her lips. She brushes the side of her neck pointedly, and you catch your reflection in the side of the toaster.

You almost groan as you see the purpling bite mark on the side of your neck.

When Jamie saunters into the kitchen five minutes later, whistling with her hands casually in her pockets, you glare at her. She just smirks and winks, and you swear you see her high five Owen and her way past.

***

As it turns out, Jamie dating you (or whatever it is the two of you are doing, you hadn’t had that conversation yet) does not soften her to the idea of Christmas. It seems that it being your favourite holiday isn’t swaying in the slightest, no matter how hard you’re trying.

She’d accompanied you, Hannah, and Owen to the mall with the kids for their Santa visit. You knew Miles was old enough to know the deal with Santa, but Flora still believed and he took his role as big brother very seriously. He held Flora’s hand as she excitedly skipped through the mall, smiling and encouraging her enthusiasm. The sight of it melted your heart, and you looked at Jamie to see if she, too, was enjoying the display of love between the siblings.

Jamie did not look like she was enjoying anything. She had a small scowl on her face as she dodged the frantic shoppers, hands buried deep in her pockets.

“You could try to look a little less like someone has sentenced you to death, you know,” you tease her lightly.

Jamie’s expression softens just a bit as she looks at you. “Sorry if I’m a downer, Poppins.” She grimaces. “I just…this is everything wrong with this time of year. Look at these people- rushing around to spend too much money, getting into arguments about who owes who what. Kids throw tantrums because mommy won’t buy them the toys they want or daddy is ignoring them yet again. I just…I hate it, kinda.”

And as you watch her look around at the crowd of people, you see a hint of sadness in her eyes as well. You hope maybe one day she’ll tell you about it, but you know you won’t push her to. Instead you brush your hand across the back of hers, smiling when she takes the hint and threads her fingers through yours.

“I know you think there are a lot of things wrong with this time of year. But look over there,” you tug her gently, motioning to your right. “I think that’s something that’s entirely right.”

And Jamie looks, and a lovely smile breaks out on her face as she takes in Miles and Flora getting to meet Santa. Flora is bursting with excitement as she takes a seat on the actor’s lap, bouncing as she gesticulates her wish list to him. Miles looks as his sister with nothing but pure adoration, and the two hold hands and smile for the camera as their picture is taken. It’s a scene right out of a movie, and Dani can’t help it if her eyes get a touch wet.

“Yeah,” Jamie says softly, “I guess that’s one thing that’s pretty okay about this time of year.”

***

It’s not easy to convince Jamie to come carolling with you. You had already gotten everyone else to agree- including Henry, much to your surprise- but Jamie was putting up a very good fight. She was seemingly resolute in her refusal.

“Dani no,” she says firmly, shaking her head. “I can’t sing worth a spit, and I won’t know any of the words.”

“Then don’t sing. Just come with us and be part of the group and join in if you feel like it.”

“Poppins…” Jamie sighs. She sets down the piece of the kitchen sink she’s trying to fix. “You’ve seen me with Christmas music. You know it’s not my scene. Can’t you guys just go and…livestream it for me or something?”

You take a surreptitious look around the kitchen, ensuring it’s empty. Then you step closer to Jamie, toying with the straps of her overalls.

“Jamie, it would mean so much to me.” You place a gentle kiss to her cheek. “And the kids would really love it if you came.” You kiss her nose, laughing when it scrunches up adorably under your lips. “And of course,” you say as you kiss the corner of her mouth, “I’d definitely owe you. I’d have to make it up to you in whatever way you wish for.”

Jamie smirks. “Whatever way I wish for?” she asks. And then she’s grabbing you by the waist and pulling you in a little roughly to connect your lips. Her tongue teases your bottom lip and you don’t hesitate to grant her entrance, moaning at the feeling. You don’t realize you’ve backed her right up against the kitchen counter until your hips grind into hers just a little bit too aggressively.

“Please,” you beg between kisses. “Come with us.”

She kisses you and threads her fingers through her hair, and you know you’ve convinced her. That doesn’t mean you’re going to stop kissing her even a second sooner than you have to, though.

***

Jamie, as it turns out, was not lying when she said she couldn’t sing. You still think it’s the cutest thing when she tries, terribly off pitch from the rest of the group. The blush coating her cheeks makes you giggle, and she elbows you to shush you.

“Stop it, Poppins,” she warns, tiny smile ruining the effectiveness of her glare. “I’m only doing this with the expectation of you keeping me company all night.”

“I wouldn’t have it any other way,” you smile. The group moves on to the next house, and you loop your arm through Jamie’s to drag her along. No doubt the pub across the street caught her eye, and there was no way you were going to let her escape and spend the rest of her night avoiding the carols.

***

It’s late. Or rather, it’s early. Jamie’s lying on her stomach in bed beside you, and you’re tracing your fingers over the raised flesh on her back. You think she’s sleeping, and it startles you when she speaks.

“It happened when I was nine.” Her voice is slightly muffled by the pillows. “The scar,” she clarifies, “I got it on Christmas day when I was nine.”

You still your fingers, almost like a kid caught stealing cookies from the jar. Jamie rolls onto her side to face you, catching your hand in hers and pulling it to her lips to place a gentle kiss on your fingers.

“I told you I grew up in the system,” she says, and her voice is rough. “But I never told you the details.”

“You don’t have to, Jamie,” you say quickly. “Really, don’t feel pressured…”

She puts a finger to your lips. “Hush, love.” The term of endearment shoots butterflies straight through you. “I want to tell you. For the first time in my life I want to share.” Jamie’s quiet for a minute, and you think she’s gathering her thoughts. “My mom never was ready to be a mom. She’d run off before I got to know her really. Mikey wasn’t even out of diapers yet and dad…well he tried. But he worked long hours just to put food on the table and my older brother Denny had too much anger in him to settle down and help. He was angry at my mom, at my dad…at the world, really. So I was basically trying to raise Mikey, and I was just a kid myself.

“The only thing I could really cook was pasta.” Jamie sniffles, and you shuffle a bit closer. You brush some hair back from her face and she closes her eyes at the soft touch. “It was Christmas day, and I felt bad enough there weren’t any presents. There should always be presents, but dad couldn’t afford ‘em and I was only nine. I bought Mikey a chocolate bar. That’s all I could do. So I thought that at least I could make a nice, actual Christmas meal. Mikey would set the table real good and the pasta would be delicious- or at least edible- and if dad came home from work that night we’d have a nice Christmas dinner just like all the other families.

“Only dad didn’t come home from work on time and Denny was angry and saying all these horrible things to me. I was just a kid, and Christmas was supposed to be fun but it wasn’t. It wasn’t and I was crying and I didn’t notice Mikey climbing onto the counters like he used to do, too near to the boiling water and…” Jamie stops, drawing in a shuddering breath.

“Jamie, it’s okay,” you whisper. You wrap your arms around her and pull her in close.

“They took us all away from dad after that. The three of us were separated and I never saw any of them again. Christmas just…I’ve only ever had awful experiences with it. It brings up all the worst times of my life. I’m sorry I hate Christmas and I ruin all your fun…”

“Hey, Jamie, no no no,” you say. You kiss away the tears running down her cheeks. “You’re not ruining anything.”

Jamie sniffles. “I see you so happy about the holidays, and I want to be too, I really do. But there are just so many bad memories.”

“So we’ll make new ones.” You kiss her lips. “We’ll work on making new memories, and until then I’ll love Christmas enough for the both of us. I’ll sing all the carols and wrap all the presents and do all the cheesy holidays things until you’re ready.”

Jamie’s looking at you with something close to wonder in her eyes. “Fuck I love you.”

You freeze, eyes going wide. Jamie’s go wide too, and she starts stuttering out what could possibly be an apology. But you don’t let her.

“Don’t apologize. Don’t apologize if you mean it.” You look her straight in her gorgeous eyes. “Did you mean it?”

Jamie nods slowly. “I do.” She swallows hard before a tiny smile creeps onto her lips. “I love you Poppins.”

You can’t help but kiss her again, and it’s a little messy and a little rough but a lot perfect. It doesn’t take long before you’re straddling her waist and holding down her arms above her. She’s breathing heavily beneath you and her curls are strewn wildly across the pillow under her head. You think you’ve never seen anything as beautiful in your entire life.

“I love you too,” you tell her earnestly. “I love you too.”

***

You discover that your love of Christmas wasn’t at the highest limit of what it could be. You’re quite literally skipping everywhere you go the next day, and you’re singing Christmas songs at the top of your lungs.

Turns out being in love around the holidays was the best aphrodisiac you’d never before experienced.

***

Icing gingerbreads had never been one of your fortes, but that didn’t mean that you didn’t love it. Owen had baked with the kids all day, and he had made so much frosting you wouldn’t be surprised if Miles and Flora ended up on sugar highs for the next month, at least. Miles kept making ‘mistakes’ with his cookies, resulting in him having to eat the ‘disaster cookie’. Flora abandoned any and all pretence and would just squirt some icing onto a spoon before shoving said spoon into her mouth happily.

“I think we should put Owen in charge of putting the monsters to bed tonight, don’t you Dani?” Hannah suggests. When you watch Miles eat an entire gingerbread in one bite with a mound of icing piled on top, you think her suggestion has a lot of merit.

Owen doesn’t appear to hear Hannah, and you think he may be having more fun than the kids. He’s giddy as he ices his cookies, his artistic creations putting the rest of yours to shame. He also cracks jokes every few minutes, each one worse than the last.

“Why did the gingerbread man call in sick to work?” Owen pauses for suspense. “Because he was feeling crumby!”

Flora starts giggling so hard her entire little body shakes.

“What did the gingerbread say when his house burned down? Darn, that cost me a lot of dough!”

You and Hannah are both rolling your eyes. Both of the kids are practically sideways in their chairs from laughing.

“How do you make a gingerbread man’s bed?” Owen looks around dramatically. You notice there’s green icing in his moustache. “With a cookie SHEET!” he thunders before laughing.

Miles is laughing so hard he gives himself the hiccups, and you’re honestly a little bit worried that Flora’s going to fall off her chair she’s giggling so much. Hannah is regarding Owen with a bit of exasperation but mostly fondness, and her look is so tender you have to look away. You feel like you’re intruding on a private moment, almost.

“Why does it sound like there’s so much fun going on in here?” Jamie comes into the kitchen, nose and cheeks red from having just been outside shovelling. “I never gave anyone permission to have so much fun.”

“Miss Jamie come ice gingerbread with us!” Flora cries in excitement.

Jamie chuckles. “Maybe I’ll just watch. I’m not great shakes in the art department.” She takes a seat beside you. “Besides,” she says under her breath, “I’m not all that fond of gingerbread.”

You roll your eyes good-naturedly at that, because of course she’s not. You think Jamie might be severely allergic to everything having to do even remotely with Christmas. Of course, as with everything else to do with the gardener, you find it endearing and adorable rather than anything else.

Jamie seems content enough to sit there and counter Owen’s jokes with terrible ones of her own. She also teases you relentlessly for your lack of icing talent, and you almost start a food fight when you take your icing bag and squirt some onto her nose. It takes Hannah to cool the situation before the kitchen becomes ground zero for an all-out icing war. You apologize sheepishly but nobody seems to care, especially Jamie. She sends you a look a bit too suggestive and inappropriate when there are children about and it makes you squirm in your seat and clench your thighs together.

“Oh no!” Flora cries. “I broke his arm off!” She holds up a poor little gingerbread in one hand, his broken off arm in the other.

“Never fear!” Owen says. “That’s why I made so many! By the way, did you hear what the gingerbread did when he hurt his leg? He iced it!”

“Owen I swear they get worse with practice,” Jamie laughs. “It should be impossible, really. And here, Flora, can I decorate that broken one?”

You try to watch what Jamie’s doing, but she leans in close to the table and wraps her arm around the cookie to block it from your view. She works studiously and for quite some time, and you’re incredibly curious as to what got her so suddenly into the cookie decorating spirit. Finally she sits upright, pushing her cookie to the middle of the table with a flourish.

“It is finished!” she exclaims, laughing so hard it’s almost a cackle.

Jamie had given the poor gingerbread a crying face. Where his arm had broken off she had put globs of red icing so it looked like blood running down from the stump. You’re mortified.

“Jamie!” you yell. “That is _not_ appropriate!”

But Jamie’s laughing so hard she’s practically crying and Owen’s cracking even more jokes about the new cookie and Miles is laughing maniacally. You look everyone’s smiles and take in their laughter, and you can’t help but join in.

***

Miles and Flora recruit all the adults to partake in their story time on the twenty-second. You had been given the role of an angel. Nobody knew any of the lines they were supposed to say (so far as you knew, Miles and Flora always just came up with their stories on the spot) but Flora had put painstaking effort into everybody’s costume. Your wings and halo are sparkly and perfect, and you’re somewhat amazed that a just barely eight year old could come up with everything so handily. Then Jamie walks into the room and you spit out the mouthful of water you had just taken in laughter.

She looks ridiculous.

The kids have put her in lederhosen, of all things, and she’s wearing green and red striped leggings underneath. She has a pair of giant plastic elf ears over her own, and she looks incredibly grumpy.

“Whiskey,” Jamie demands. “Scotch. Tequila. Anything. If I’m going to get through the next few hours, I’ll definitely need to be drunk.”

You can’t help but snigger. Jamie just looks so darn outlandish.

“Don’t laugh at me. Poppins, I’m serious! These ears are dreadful they’re way too heavy. Oh you think it’s funny? I’m gonna make you wear them, then, see how you like them. Poppins, I’m serious. Do not laugh at me…Poppins!”

***

“I don’t know who any of these people are,” you whisper to Hannah nervously. You’re clutching the stem of your crystal wine glass just a bit too tight, and you’re honestly surprised you haven’t shattered it yet.

“I don’t either,” Hannah admits. “They’re all business associates of Henry’s I presume. Just mingle, and try not to spill wine or champagne on anyone. Owen did two years ago when we were back in England and it _did not_ go over well.”

You stifle a laugh and try to follow Hannah’s suggestion.

Henry had decided to host a Christmas party at Bly on the twenty-third. He had extended invites to you, Owen, Hannah, and Jamie, but insisted the children had to be in bed by the time the party started. Jamie offered to tuck them in, and you were beginning to realize that was just an excuse to miss a bit of the party.

The manor was filled with all manner of socialites. Men and women in designer clothes so obnoxiously expensive it blew your mind were scattered about everywhere. It was rather intimidating. Aside from Hannah and Owen, you had no idea who anyone was. And it was beyond obvious you didn’t really fit in. You had put on your best dress for the occasion, and you still felt severely underdressed. You realize that it probably would have been the way your life went had you gone through with marrying Eddie. You would’ve had to hang on his arm for numerous parties like this. You gulp down your glass of wine, grateful, as you often were, that life had taken you in a different direction.

Henry hired a DJ for the night, and there are some people attempting to get a bit of a dance party going. You had always enjoyed dancing, but you felt way too self-conscious to head out there alone. You felt judged enough as it was standing in a corner sipping at your drink. You think about maybe just slipping out of the room and hiding out in the kitchen. Nobody would notice, would they?

“You’re an absolute vision.”

You turn and Jamie’s there suddenly, dressed in a fitted suit jacket and a tight button down shirt which makes your mouth go dry. She seems just as taken with your outfit, and you’re suddenly insanely glad that you didn’t try to hide. The way Jamie’s eyes darken as they drift over the slit in the side of your dress and the low plunge of the neckline makes you giddy.

“May I have this dance?” Jamie asks, holding out a hand in offering.

You bite your bottom lip and nod, taking Jamie’s hand. You let her lead you to the periphery of where some guests had started dancing.

“I should warn you, I’m not great at this kind of dancing.” Jamie blushes, looking down at her feet. “Ballroom I’m okay at, but this…”

You simply wrap your arms around her neck, starting to sway to the music. “You’re perfect,” you tell her. You wonder if you’ll be brave enough to kiss her in front of all these strangers before the night is through.

“I’ve never enjoyed these parties that Henry hosts,” she admits after a moment. She’s trying her best to find a rhythm with you, and you think she isn’t doing half bad. “I’ve always thought they’re full of pompous excuses for people. I always feel judged. But I think this one’s not that terrible. As long as I’ve got you by my side, Poppins.”

You smile at her. “I’ll stay by your side as long as you want me to.”

“Forever?” she proposes, and your heart flutters.

Before you can respond, Owen and Hannah twirl up alongside you, dancing boisterously. “Did you know that plumbers always prefer to tap dance?” Owen jokes.

Jamie groans and drops her head onto your shoulder. “Make him stop, Poppins, please.”

“Don’t get mad at me! I trained in dancing at the best place in California…the San Fran-Disco.” Even Hannah groans at that one. Owen laughs. “Meet us in the rec room in the basement in thirty minutes. Jamie knows what’s up.”

Owen spins Hannah away back to the middle of the dance floor and you look at Jamie quizzically. “What did he mean by that?”

Jamie smirks. “Usually when we’ve had enough of the stiffs we steal a few bottles of booze and sneak off to our own after party. You interested?”

You definitely are. You nod and pull her in closer. Jamie’s selling herself short on her dancing ability, you think. She’s keeping up with you, and keeping time with the music. And then Jamie smiles a little devilishly and you wonder why before she shifts and you feel a thigh slip in between your own, pressing innocently enough but it still sends a rush of heat straight to your core.

“Jamie,” you moan, trying to keep quiet. You feel her flex the muscles of her thigh and you tremble. “I think you lied to me. You’re quite good at dancing.”

She shrugs, trying to look innocent. “You bring out the best in me.”

And it’s kind of ridiculous, but you’re overcome by a rush of happiness. You’re in the middle of a room filled with overly rich strangers and you don’t fit in in the slightest way, but you’ve got a beautiful woman in your arms and she loves you. Without thinking about it twice, you lean down and capture her lips in a lingering kiss. It feels so good to be kissing Jamie, and you’re not concerned in the slightest about everyone else around you.

“I love you,” you whisper into her ear after breaking apart.

“Geez Poppins,” she breathes, “keep that up and I won’t make it to the after party.”

***

You do end up making it to the after party, much to Jamie’s dismay. You can tell all she wants to do is drag you to the bedroom, but you’re craving some more alcohol and some more time spent with Hannah and Owen. The rec room isn’t much more than a small room beside the wine cellar in the basement with mismatched furniture and a TV bigger than your car, but the four of you settle in comfortably, getting drunker by the second.

Drunk Jamie is quite handsy, you realize. You’re trying to concentrate on the game of Monopoly Owen had produced, but you’re somewhat tipsy and Jamie’s hand is on your inner thigh and it’s really hard to focus. Her hand creeps up higher and you try to sneakily swat it away with Hannah and Owen noticing.

“Stop it,” you hiss at your favourite gardener, giggling slightly.

“You two are so cute,” Hannah says, and you still immediately. Hannah smiles at you. “Oh come now, you two are not subtle in the slightest. But we all think it’s great.”

“You do?” you ask, hardly able to believe it.

“Bestly compatible couple ever,” Owen hiccups, slurring his words. But there’s a genuine smile peeking out from beneath his moustache. “I’m in adoration of Damie. That’s your couple name,” he adds, seeing your confused look.

“Hey Poppins, did ya hear that?” Jamie asks. “We’ve got a couple name. We’ve made it, I tell ya.”

It’s a struggle, later, to get Jamie up to her bedroom. You’re both more than a little drunk, but Jamie seems to only have one thing on her mind, and she keeps pressing you up against whatever surface is nearest to kiss you soundly. You don’t really mind, but you also are trying to be mindful of the other people in the house. You’re making out against the bannister and her hand is sneaking up the slit in the side of your dress.

“Jamie,” you try to stop her, though you’re not really trying that hard, to be honest. “We’ve got to- _fuck_ \- we can’t do this here.”

“Mmm but I want you,” she says, nibbling at the pulse point on your neck.

“I want you too,” you say. “But not here. Come on, we can make it to the bedroom.”

You push her away and grab her hand, practically tripping over your high heels as you more or less sprint to your bedroom. Then you decide to head for Jamie’s room instead because it’s closer and she’s really handsy and you really can’t wait any longer.

***

The next morning sees Jamie slumped over her cup of tea at the island in the kitchen. Luckily the hangover had skipped over you. All you feel is mild throbbing at your temples, and you know it will be gone completely once you wake up just a little bit more. But Jamie is clearly miserable, and had only been responding with monosyllables since getting up at five to be sick in the toilet.

“Did someone indulge a bit too much last night?” Owen says cheerfully.

Jamie looks up just long enough to glare at him with bloodshot eyes before letting her head fall back down the countertop.

“She’s having a rough time of it,” you say, torn between amusement and concern.

“I’ll whip up a good breakfast to cure her ills,” Owen promises. “But honestly, it looks like at least she earned the hangover. You might want to wear a turtleneck for a couple of days, Dani.”

Owen whistles cheerfully as he turns to the stove, and you clap your hands over the skin of your neck. Jamie glances up, grinning mischievously despite her pallor. You scowl at her.

“I hate you,” you huff.

“No you don’t,” she smirks.

And you don’t. You really, really don’t.

***

Jamie’s hangover has mostly disappeared by noon. It’s a good thing, really, because the kids are requiring all hands on deck. Something about Christmas Eve has seemingly injected them with a shot of energy. They’re practically climbing the walls, and nothing seems to calm them down.

You try taking them on a walk outside, and then some more tobogganing (you’ve hidden the dreaded snowboard where Jamie will never find it), and you even try some ice skating on the frozen pond down the road. Nothing tires them out, not even a little bit. You, Hannah, Jamie, and Owen are all exhausted, but the kids are just as jacked up as they been upon waking up.

“It’s no use,” Owen puffs, sprawled on his back on the ice. “I admit defeat.”

Suppertime is an absolute nightmare, but at least both Miles and Flora clear their plates. You let them watch one Christmas movie afterwards, and then you demand that it’s time for bed. It’s well past their bedtime, but the kids are still up and about, showing no signs of settling. You’re about ready to just give up and say the hell with it. It’s Jamie, surprisingly, who figures out their kryptonite.

She pulls her phone out of her back pocket and opens up the Santa tracker. “Would you look at this! Santa just landed in North America. He’s on his way, and if he sees you two wee gremlins out of bed not listening, he might just pass right over this house without stopping.”

Flora is tucked underneath her covers in an instant, and Miles runs off to his room and practically throws himself into his bed. You smile gratefully at Jamie.

“I hate Christmas, Poppins,” she laughs. “That doesn’t mean I don’t have a few tricks up my sleeve.”

***

It had always been your tradition on Christmas Eve to stay up as late as possible watching Christmas movies. More often than not you ended up falling asleep on the couch. This year is different though.

This year is different because you have two children in your care expecting to wake up to the magic of Christmas morning, and you really want to fulfill that dream. Henry could be as absent as he wanted, but you were determined to make sure the kids had a wonderful morning. You had made sure to gather all the gifts everyone had for Miles and Flora days before. Unfortunately you had yet to wrap any of them, and you had never really mastered the art of wrapping presents.

You’re ripping the paper off of a box set of the Chronicles of Narnia for Miles for the fifth time in frustration when Jamie appears in the doorway.

“You want some help?” she asks.

You smile ruefully. “I should not have left this until the last minute,” you say sadly. “All I want is for Christmas morning to be perfect, but the kids are going to end up with a bunch of presents that look like they’ve been wrapped by a drunken elf.”

Jamie smiles warmly at you. “Scoot over,” she says, and she comes over to sit on the floor beside you. “In another life, I may have taken a temp job at a shopping mall over the holidays to make a bit of extra cash. I may remember a thing or two.”

Two minutes later the box set is wrapped as perfectly as you’d ever seen. You can’t help but kiss Jamie gratefully.

“Thank you!” you squeal. “You’re saving my life right now, I swear.”

But Jamie’s all business. She presses the tape into your hands. “You’re on tape duty. Keep cutting pieces an inch or two in length. We’ve got a lot of presents to wrap here, Poppins.”

You could get used to this, you think. There’s something soothing and perfect about staying up late on Christmas Eve with Jamie by your side, wrapping presents together for the world’s cutest children. There’s something just so entirely right about it. It almost feels like something you’ve known you’ve wanted for your whole life, but haven’t quite been able to put it into words until right then. You think that you could spend every Christmas from then on exactly the same as this one. You wonder if Jamie might feel the same.

It’s just gone one in the morning when all the presents are expertly wrapped and piled under the tree. You and Jamie have probably too much fun filling everyone’s stockings. Jamie looks positively gleeful when you hand her the lump of coal you had bought to jokingly put in Owen’s stocking.

“Well, I think that should just about do it,” Jamie says as you both stand back to look at your handiwork in the living. “Still plenty of room for everyone else’s presents in the morning, but the gremlins should enjoy this at least.”

“It’s perfect,” you smile. Then you start to panic a bit. “Do you think it’s enough? Should we try to do anything more? Do you think that Flora will enjoy it and still believe in Santa?”

Jamie looks at you thoughtfully for a minute. Then she smiles and laughs under her breath, shaking her head almost as if in disbelief. “Give me a moment, Poppins.”

Jamie darts out of the room, leaving you standing there alone, wondering what she’s up to. It takes about five minutes before she returns, holding a pair of Owen’s work boots, a broomstick, and a giant stuffed moose Hannah had brought back for the kids after travelling to Canada the previous summer. You stare at her.

“Just trust me,” Jamie says. She quirks her head to the side. “Come on. Come see my genius in action.”

She takes you to the back door leading off the living. You watch as Jamie dons Owen’s giant boots, looking faintly preposterous in them. She heads outside, walking backwards, treading carefully in the snow covering the stone patio. You watch as she uses the end of the broomstick to draw two parallel lines in the snow. Next she takes the moose and presses its paws into the snow, and you realize as you get a better look that they could easily pass for reindeer tracks. When Jamie’s satisfied, she makes her way back to you, grinning from ear to ear.

The scene she created is nothing less than magical, you think. It looks like a sleigh has landed in the snow, and a whole bunch of reindeer had landed with it, stomping their hooves in the snow. The boot tracks leading to the house could easily be from Santa. You know Flora is going to go absolutely wild when she sees it.

“Jamie, it’s amazing!” you gush. “How did you think of it?”

Jamie shrugs. “You bring out the best in me, Poppins. Maybe, deep down, there’s hope for me after all. Maybe I’m not destined to be a Grinch for the rest of my life.”

You laugh slightly, pulling her in for a tight hug. “Thank you. Tomorrow morning is going to be magical.”

“I hope so.” Jamie’s arms are wrapped around your shoulders, and you could stay there in the embrace forever. “Although, it is tomorrow already. And if we don’t get to sleep soon, I doubt we’ll get any at all. No doubt Flora will have us up at the crack of dawn.”

You think she’s probably right, so you reluctantly loosen your grip. You’re almost to the stares when you stop in your tracks, panicking.

“We forgot about the cookies Flora left out!” You’re running back to the living room urgently. “If we don’t eat some of the cookies then she’ll definitely know what’s up and she’ll stop believing in Santa and it will be all my fault…”

You stop short.

The plate of cookies Flora had put out on the coffee table before bedtime is half empty. There are crumbs and even a couple cookies with only a bite out of them for good measure. The glass of milk is three quarters gone too. You look at Jamie, smiling.

“You’re perfect, do you know that?”

Jamie laughs, rubbing the back of her neck bashfully. “I wouldn’t go that far,” she says. “Maybe I just found myself in the Christmas spirit a little bit tonight.”

You kiss her. You kiss Jamie and you’re so overcome with emotion. She makes you so happy and you don’t even know if she realizes it. She’s just made your night, and you know she’s made Flora’s Christmas. Jamie’s so selfless and you kiss her and you can feel the love flowing between the two of you. You never want to let go of her.

“Be my girlfriend,” you say when you finally part from her lips. “Will you? Do you want to?”

Jamie grins. “Isn’t it obvious?” Jamie kisses you again, and it’s far too chaste for the heat that it causes to build up inside you. “Yes I want to. Yes I’ll be your girlfriend, Poppins.”

***

Christmas morning is a blur of absolute chaotic perfection. Flora is indeed banging on everyone’s doors at the crack of dawn, and as much as you wanted nothing more than to stay in bed with your girlfriend, you were also far too excited to see the kids’ reactions. So you had simply stretched and kissed Jamie’s temple when she whined about five more minutes.

Owen was making tea and coffee for everyone by the time you make your way downstairs, still in your pajamas. Jamie follows behind you, knotting her robe around her waist, still seeming ninety percent asleep. When Flora shrieks with ear splitting delight at the sight of the Christmas tree Jamie almost jumps right out of her skin. You pull her into your side and press a kiss to her unruly curls.

Flora is downright gobsmacked at the scene outside in the snow. Even Miles looks frankly amazed, and he had been in on the whole Santa gambit since the summer. You can see the wheels turning in his head and can’t help but laugh.

The children are maniacs when it comes to opening their presents. Wrapping paper is flying everywhere and bows and ribbons litter the floor. Everyone, even the adults, gets right into the swing of things, and there are presents for everyone.

Jamie is speechless for a bit when she opens the camera you got her. You get a little panicky.

“I hope it’s the right one,” you start to ramble, “I know you’ve been talking about getting a new camera, but didn’t know which one to get and…”

Jamie cuts you off with a kiss. “It’s perfect,” she says. “But Dani, this is so much…I mean you even got me different lenses with it and everything. I don’t know how to thank you for this…”

This time it’s you who cuts her off, and your kiss is maybe just a bit too long and deep considering it’s in front of the rest of the family. It’s Owen’s catcalling that breaks you apart, and your cheeks warm a bit. Then Flora’s running up to you and wrapping her tiny arms around each of your necks, pulling you into a three way hug.

“I knew it, I knew it!” she giggles excitedly. “I just knew the two of you were in love with each other! It’s just perfectly splendid!”

Just as quickly as she appeared Flora’s off again to play with her new toys. You laugh, and then Jamie’s pressing a package into your hands. It’s wrapped flawlessly, and you’re struck again by how cute it is that your Grinchy girlfriend is so naturally talented when it comes to Christmas. You carefully peel off the wrapping paper. Inside are the first two Home Alone movies (the only ones that counted, you remember you told Jamie) with a pair of plane tickets taped to them. You examine the tickets for a minute, and then look up at Jamie, pleasantly surprised.

Jamie, however, looks vaguely nervous. “It’s not much, back home, where I lived. It’s kinda boring, in fact. But then I thought, maybe Poppins might fancy a little boredom with me in the spring. It’s probably a shite vacation, I know, but…”

“I love it,” you say honesty. “I think it’s the most brilliant thing anybody has ever given me.”

Jamie crinkles her brow. “Yeah?” she double checks.

“Yeah,” you confirm. “I would love to go on a boring little vacation with you.”

The excitement of the morning carries over into the afternoon, and everyone is still filled with the energy that only Christmas could bring. Owen eventually makes his way into the kitchen to start Christmas dinner, and Henry- who was being remarkably present and sober that morning- follows to offer some help. You’re cozily snuggling on the couch with Jamie, watching as Miles reads his new books and Flora plays with her dolls. Jamie has promised them she’ll set up the Playstation for them the next day, and you knew that was the only reason they were somewhat calm.

You rest your head on Jamie’s shoulder, smiling contentedly. For as much as you always loved Christmas, you never realized just how perfect it could be. But this, you think, this is how you wanted Christmas to be every year.

“Maybe the holidays aren’t so bad,” Jamie says eventually, and you crane your head to look up her. She’s smiling fondly at the kids, and she does look comfortable.

“I’m glad you’re having a good day,” you say happily, relaxing back into her side. Jamie presses a kiss to the top of your head.

“It really is the best day, kinda. Merry Christmas Poppins.”

You smile. “Merry Christmas, Jamie.”

“We still need to have a serious chat about your taste in music, though.”

***

_Fin_

**Author's Note:**

> If you made it this far, thank you for reading! Happy holidays, or simply happy December, and congrats on being only 18 days away from surviving 2020!


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